I just wanted to say RIP to both Gary Coleman and to Dennis Hopper.

As a child of the ’80′s, I spent a majority of my childhood fascinated by the rich urban life portrayed in “Diff’rent Strokes”. This was a new and exciting world for a girl from the country. Who didn’t go through elementary school using the catch phrase, “Whatchoo talkin’ ’bout, Willis?”. I mean! It was THE thing to say.  Sure, a bunch of middle class white kids wasn’t quite the same as the precocious black boy on TV, but we tried.(I was also fascinated by “The Facts of Life”, “Webster”, “Alf”, “The Jeffersons”, “Good Times”, and, of course, Jackee from “227″.)

As for Dennis Hopper, my first introduction came in the form of “Hoosiers”, followed by one of my most favorite movies of all time, “Speed” (The original one with Sandra and Keaunu). He was an awesome bad guy in Speed, but you know, the decapitiation via subway ceiling sign was pretty gruesome (and a great reminder about why it’s a really bad idea to ride on the top of subway cars).

As we all know, celebrity death comes in three’s. I can’t do anything but dread which of the next celebrities will be the next to go. I only hope to God that Betty White isn’t it.  Betty White is awesome. She deserves to live forever.

Okay, the Brain and I were on a temporay LOA for part of the week. I know, I know–I should have told you, and then you could have offered to pick up my mail and grab my paper, and do all that fun neighborly stuff for me. I’ll remember next time.

Anyways, as the Brain and I walked down Penn Street last night, after partaking of a super awesome burger at 5 Guys in the Inner Harbor, we saw something that we inwardly cheer and jeer at the same time: a flattened rat in the street. I mean, ICK–but YAY!

Ick because it stinks and breeds flies–Yay because it’s one less vermin crawling the streets.

I know, TMI, but I really needed something to write about, and since I’ve been MIA for almost a week, this is the best I could do.  Get over it. Just be happy I didn’t post a picture of it.

Last year, Dover Street came under media scrutiny with the death of Carrie John, and the arrest of her fiance, Clinton McCracken.

I’m not going to cast judgement on them–it’s not my place. I didn’t know either of them personally, and the Brain and I’s sole interaction with them had been in “hi” while walking past each other on the street.

I do mourn, though. I mourn for the life lost. I mourn for the brilliant minds (both John and McCracken) that will not be able to continue their research.

While walking down Dover Street one morning last week, I spotted this little bit of life struggling up through the cracks. I thought it was appropriate.  After such a long hard winter, new life has bloomed. 

A little life struggling

From www.xkcd.com. I love this webiste.

Starting a new home on the internet is always a struggle. ( I hate the word ‘blog’. It makes me think of ‘bog’, and bog leads to smog, and why do I care about California, anyways?)

How do you get readers when you want to remain anonymous? This is a biggie for me. I want to keep my identity a secret. I want to be able to write what I want under the cover of anonymity. I want to be able to walk down my neighborhood streets and talk to people I see and not have them judge me because I don’t necessarily agree with their opinions, or I laugh at them behind closed doors or openly on the internets.  I don’t want to find a horse head in my bed.

It’s not like I can go out and be like:

Me: “Hi, Random Stranger. My name is Pinky. I write a blog about Ridgely’s Delight, called, www.ridgelysafternoondelight.  See what  I did there? It’s a total play on “Afternoon Delight” by the Starland Vocal Band.  I know, funny, right?  You should totally read it and let me know what you think!”.

Psycho-killer: “I want to eat your eyeballs”.

I mean! What if they want to steal my liver and sell it on the blackmarket? My liver is in tip-top shape. I don’t have any weird diseases and I don’t drink to extinction. I bet I could get all kinds of money for my assorted body parts! But thats MY body part money, darn it. Keep your fingers off, crazy man! I need that for my retirement!

Anyways, I digress. To the few peole who may have stumbled on my little slice of the internet in the recent past, and who have come back to read me again, I thank you for your continued patronage. With your help, my kick-ass writing, and the powers of the Brain, I’ve slowly been climbing up the Google ranks.  When I first started out, I was down so far, it took days for me to find myself. Now, as of yesterday, I’m on page six of a search for “Ridgely’s Delight”. I couldn’t have done it without you, internet minions. With your help, I WILL take over the wor…I mean, be a page one return one day.

Peace!

*sigh* It’s Monday. It’s rainy. It’s blah.

The kind of day that you wish you could pull the covers over your head when the alarm goes off, stay in bed, and fall back asleep listening to the pitter-patter of the rain.  It’s the kind of day you could literally sleep away, since the overcast skies and tall buildings filter the light to nothing more than a sparse afterthought.

The skies over the Inner Harbor are gray today, and even the little birdies aren’t up to more than chilling out on the pier.

I’m on the countdown until I can leave The Evil Empire and head back into the confines of the ‘hood, throw on my pj’s, and wait until it’s acceptably late enough to go to bed.

Have a good one, ya’ll.

So, the big thing this weekend is the Preakness (the second ‘jewel’ in the Triple Crown of horse racing). Yeah, I know right? It’s Maryland–not my first guess for where there would be horse racing.

Anyways, the infield is supossedly a big drunken orgy, and the grandstands are full of the richey-riches in their race day finery. And where will the Brain and I be during this monumental event? At home, of course.  Not being ones to drink ourselves into alcoholic comas–nor ones to wear churchy type clothes on weekends, we are planning a nice quiet weekend at home.

Some other fun things going on tonight are: The Preakness Parade tonight at 8:30 (which means if you live in Ridgely’s Delight, I would suggest getting your ass home and finding a parking spot before 6pm), the Orioles game (with Fireworks–another reason parking will SUCK major donkey balls).

Tomorrow, other than the Preakness out at Pimlico, there’s some stuff going on downtown, too. For example, it’s Tooth Fairy Day at the National Museum of Dentistry.

Have a good (fun) (and safe) weekend! Just don’t call me to come pick you up when you lose your bus pass, and noone will give your suburned, sweary, beer reeking, vomit covered self a ride home.  (just kidding–I don’t have friends who would do stuff like that–so it’s all good!)

Stop stealing my paper, b1tches!

One of my most favorite things to do on Thursdays is to come home, and read the Baltimore Guide. However, that hasn’t happened in several weeks, as I haven’t actually gotten a Guide in a long time. I love me some good Guide reading–SOBO crime watches, church dinners, news and activities for seniors (only 35 more years until that’s applicable to me!), or that picture of the guy in the 40′s fedora who looks like he might be an old school P.I. but is really more like a lawyer.  Supossedly. The Baltimore Guide has it all!

I tried reading it online, and even though I was all excited when I saw that someone got hit over the head with a brick, it just doesn’t feel the same as holding a piece of newprint in your hands. I can’t turn around to the Brain and be like, ‘Brain, listen to this…’.  Especially since I do most of my interneting at work, and my co-workers wouldn’t be as fascinated with my report of city crime (darn suburbanites!).

Sure, I hate smudgy ink, but I like TANGIBLE reading. I read the Balt Sun every single day. I read The B  every single day. I grew up in a house with daily papers, and I love that I can get my news delivered, and waiting on my doorstep every (almost) single morning.  Sure, sometimes it’s stolen by the time I get up, but unless it’s the Thursday or Saturday edition–well, I can deal with it. Saturday’s edition has all the coupons and comics for both Saturday AND Sunday! I mean! And Thursday, is well, just a precurser to Friday.

Come back to Ridgely’s Delight, Baltimore Guide. I miss you! My Thursdays haven’t been the same since you’ve been gone!

(cue Kelly Clarkson song here)

Suck it!

Please, when you parallel into a parking spot, make sure that you leave enough room for your vehicle, but also for the vehicles that you are parking between.  Nothing is more irritating than going to leave for work in the morning, and finding out that you are expected to move your vehicle out of a spot with less than 4 total inches of clearance.  FOUR INCHES. Really? I’m supossed to manuever out of a parking spot with FOUR INCHES of space? And you expect me to not hit your precious car? Especially when you leave 3.5 feet of room in front of YOUR car, to allow for easy exit?

Just an FYI–I’m a hella good parallel parker,  but you and the car behind me are gonna get bumped.  Repeatedly. And then again, just because I’m pissed off at you, I’ll bump you again for good measure. I’d expect, between the anger and the actual necessity, anywhere from 3-8 bumps while I manuver out of my newly created micro-spot. B1thches.

I meant to post about this yesterday, but forgot. It’s not too late to take advantage of the weekend festivities at the Inner Harbor this weekend.

The BaltiMore Happiness for Less combines alot of area events an reduced price admissions to area attractions–slated to appeal to the locals. For example, two for one admissions to the “Top of the World” at the Baltimore World Trade Center.  Two years ago, the Brain and I paid $10 EACH to go to the observation level–so this is actually pretty cool.

I’m rather disappointed that this wasn’t marketed more. I didn’t know about the events this weekend until I read the Live section of the Balt Sun (which is the Friday edition). Harbor passes, which purchased in advance allowed admission to 4 or 5 local attractions, were available for advance purchase.  ADVANCE purchase. Hello? Three day advance purchase.

So even though it’s too late to get the money saving Harbor Pass, go ahead and head out to the Inner Harbor tomorrow and partake of something fun.

Yeah, I know that this starts like a bad joke–but seriously. I did go home for lunch, and as I was leaving the ‘hood, I saw an atrocious crime against nature. Really. I did.

It was a UM employee ( How do I know it was a UM employee? Well, because they were smoking a cigarette behind their place of employment. duh.) Anyways, I digress.  The atrocity was the outfit they were wearing. A FLESH colored tank top and a peasant skirt. Not just flesh colored–but that slinky material that is wrong on so many levels because it’s basically nothing but woven plastic. And it was SKIN TIGHT to the point that it hugged each and every single roll of her backfat, making it look like she was naked from the waist up.  I did a doubletake because I thought that she was, indeed, naked from the waist up. Thankfully, she had her back turned to the street, possibly to hide her face from the UM security cameras that flank the building.

Not that I wanted to see a naked chick (being a chick, I don’t go in for that kind of thing–not that there’s anything wrong with it if you do. just sayin’)

I snapped a picture with my rockin’ new phone, but forgot to hit the save button–so I can’t show you what I mean–but it was bad. So very bad. I wish I could show you. I really wish I could.