Stop stealing my paper, b1tches!

One of my most favorite things to do on Thursdays is to come home, and read the Baltimore Guide. However, that hasn’t happened in several weeks, as I haven’t actually gotten a Guide in a long time. I love me some good Guide reading–SOBO crime watches, church dinners, news and activities for seniors (only 35 more years until that’s applicable to me!), or that picture of the guy in the 40′s fedora who looks like he might be an old school P.I. but is really more like a lawyer.  Supossedly. The Baltimore Guide has it all!

I tried reading it online, and even though I was all excited when I saw that someone got hit over the head with a brick, it just doesn’t feel the same as holding a piece of newprint in your hands. I can’t turn around to the Brain and be like, ‘Brain, listen to this…’.  Especially since I do most of my interneting at work, and my co-workers wouldn’t be as fascinated with my report of city crime (darn suburbanites!).

Sure, I hate smudgy ink, but I like TANGIBLE reading. I read the Balt Sun every single day. I read The B  every single day. I grew up in a house with daily papers, and I love that I can get my news delivered, and waiting on my doorstep every (almost) single morning.  Sure, sometimes it’s stolen by the time I get up, but unless it’s the Thursday or Saturday edition–well, I can deal with it. Saturday’s edition has all the coupons and comics for both Saturday AND Sunday! I mean! And Thursday, is well, just a precurser to Friday.

Come back to Ridgely’s Delight, Baltimore Guide. I miss you! My Thursdays haven’t been the same since you’ve been gone!

(cue Kelly Clarkson song here)

Just read the B’more Guide (serving the residents of Federal Hill, South Baltimore, Locust Point, and more!), and there’s no police blotter this week.

How am I supossed to find out how many idiots had their GPS units stolen, or on which corner someone hit someone else with a brick and then ran away, or how many 14 y/o’s were robbed at bus stops of their pay-as-you-go cell phones and bus passes??

The police blotter rocks–as long as crime stays far away from Ridgely’s and from me–like across MLK in Pigtown.

This morning, what seemed to be well before the alarm, the blaring of a car alarm brought me to consciousness. And it continued to bleat for what seemed like hours, non-stop. It wasn’t directly outside of my door, so I was able to block it out and go back into a quasi-sleep state until the actual alarm went off.

Walking to my car this morning, I walked past a car with that left the passenger window down…or so I thought. Actually, the shattered safety glass window was on the ground, and the car was in disarray. I guess this vehicle was the source of the alarm. However, I can’t help but wonder if the houses that were located much much closer to the blaring car even looked out to see the source of the beeping horn, or even cared, since it wasn’t their vehicle. I’ll be honest, I didn’t contemplate calling the cops to report the broken into car–it’s not my car, and besides, it’s not like I know the person who owns the car. What could I tell them besides the fact that I walked by it and noticed it was broken into? I think that probably needs to be done by the person who owns the car.

Whenever I read the Baltimore Guide crime blotter, it’s chock full of cars that have been broken into–usually to steal a blatantly displayed GPS.  One of the first things I was told about living in this neighborhood was that you NEVER EVER leave anything in your car.  EVER. And I have abided by this rule–or if I do keep things in the car, they are out of sight from passerby.  Yet every single day, someone gets a vehicle broken into, and a GPS, or a laptop, or a set of golfclubs gets stolen. What are you thinking? Cars are not indestructible and failproof  safes. They’re 60% glass! And we all know that glass is breakable!

Every morning before driving off to work, I check my car over for 1. broken windows and 2. a license plate. There for a time, license plates were being stolen like crazy. Luckily, I’ve been able to retain mine. I think it would be weird to be driving down the street and suddenly see my license plate pass me, attached to another vehicle. It would be like an Alfred Hitchcock Presents….car deja vu.